Maybe there are none

"I can't find a good picture of a tractor."

Snarky mode on...

"It looks good in Blackberry."
- Said when looking at a website in the Blackberry browser.

Yes, that's lattice, not lettuce

"You can eat the lattice, but don't judge the lattice, because the lattice is suboptimal."

At Least There's Fiber In It...

I ate too many Pilgrim's Hats.

- My sister, referring to a Thanksgiving cookie.

Where Exactly are you Clicking?

I'm going to click on Rod Stewart.

- A friend clicking on an online ad

Um, I know it's not the jackhammer...

"Are you here about the service request or the jackhammer issue?"

- My boss